Notes from the death bed of my grandmother
I have kept this in my unread emails for nearly a month, after having opened it day it arrived in the inbox and gotten a couple-few paragraphs in before realizing it was something I needed time, and space, to take in word by word.
I've been there -- multiple times. Amazingly many times. Stuff like staring at the chicken thinking about antibiotics and discussing a bite of lamb is common, understandable, and human. You illustrate it well. And unfortunately, since I've seen this happen so often, I sometimes take the role of your mother, the one who sees when the last threshold of 'coming back' is passed and realizes the rest is just keeping everyone as comfortable as possible.
You did a good service, to yourself, to your family, and to others who have experienced grief from death, in writing this as detailed and intimately as you have.
What a beautiful tribute to her. I remember when I lost my great grandmother when I was 8 the first person I ever lost. And it makes me think about my grandmother, now 87 whose loss I dread more than anything in this world. I wrote a bit about them here: https://comfortwithtruth.substack.com/p/the-children-get-up-and-reign-anotherhtml Thanks for sharing.
Beautiful story. You pay attention and process life's moments with grace.
I kept company with both my parents as they left this life. I'd like to express the experience in writing as well as you did. My husband and I sang to my mother as she departed. My father died weeks before my son was born. Both stories contained humor (oddly) as well as sorrow. Perhaps I'll record them.
Thank you again for sharing your memories of your grandmother.
This is incredible writing, thank you for sharing. My own grandma is predicted to die soon-ish, possibly before I graduate college, and I doubt it will be so tender. I don't know her very well and my mom (by her own account) won't care very much. No one I know personally has died before so when it happens, I'll probably think of Ingrid. I'm also glad and slightly surprised that you were allowed to touch her body, I would have assumed the hospital wouldn't allow that.
2 in a row; got me.
Beautiful piece. Thank you for writing this.
This made me think about how different cultures process death and grief in different ways. For instance, here at my place, there is more emphasis on rituals that need to be followed and less so on dialogue.
Reminded me of conditions of my parents
I lost my grandma a few days ago - this is very touching.